Jun

2000

A spiritual reward

I cherish the soft smoothness
that I now see.
A tone of health —
a tone to worship.

There was a day when once I knew
the supple firmness that time must rip away.

I mourn a youth I could have had
but face a future without regret,
for the here and now is
the culmination of
a journey of enlightenment.

Though I love to ponder,
I love to roam,
I love to think and onward go.
I feel adept and well-equiped
Though life is not an easy gift
I plow away hoping to reap
a spiritual reward.

A freedom to express and grow,
To continue on to what I’ll know
will be the satiation of desires,
by removing needs and desires.

Thus, I am inspired.

Though what time must rip away,
tenuously I’ll cling to for as long as I may,
I’ll look back and cherish the supple firmness,
the smooth, soft youth
I’d once portrayed.

And I’ll look forward and know
that it will again come my way.

posted in Introspection, Metaphysical, Personal, Poems | No Comments

Jun

2000

Untitled, June 30th, 2000

by Stephen Messer

If I had been so cruel as to do you in,
there wouldn’t have been any shame to it.

If I had been the one to leave you dry,
There couldn’t be any replacement.

Of all of the things that we’ve tried,
It just cannot be a mistake made,

Since I’m here at the end, I’m here at the end
I’ve been far away and have come back again,
There will be no end, for the lives that we’ve spent,
and built upon and grown with,
The lives that for a while, have been duly spent,
In a humble adoration
Of what we’ve got

In each other
In the one
In another as your own.

Since I’m here at the end, I’m here alone again,
And back where I’ve thought it could start,
For the way isn’t far from the feelings I’ll share

In each other
In the one
In another as you.

posted in Personal, Poems | No Comments

May

2000

Memory of me

by Stephen Messer

Will there be anything more than a memory of me
when I leave this life behind?
A memory in the few who knew me,
that will eventually pass on.

Will I leave behind anything more than a memory
A contribution of what I
There are a few things that we can do
to make ourselves more known and more of a part
of a society that contributes to the inevitable demise
we all face as a society and as a part of me.

But the part that I take with me and carry on to a
future existence beyond this world
is the part that counts. The relationships built
upon and worked out will be those that make or break me.

I don’t know. I’m challenged by the feelings I’m afraid to feel;
the thoughts I’m afraid to think.
Yet those thoughts are the ones that can liberate me;
Liberated by my fears, by facing and meeting and greeting them.

I take to heart all I’ve known and all I can become.
A pile of ashes, a few short-lived memories.

All I can become.

posted in Introspection, Metaphysical, Poems | No Comments

Mar

2000

Walk Away

by Stephen Messer

And if I walk away will you come with me
and if I do not stay will you run with me
and if I feel tomorrow’s pressures pounding me
towards perverted circumstance
I’ll be the one who knows
don’t you let me go
so easily

And if there is a life you’ll have fun with me
And if there is some time we’ll know we’ve got to be free
And if I feel the weight of what’s coming over me
taking perverted happenstance
I’ll be the one who knows
Not to let you go
so easily

And while all the time we’ve spent means the world to me
And while everything we’ve learnt is redefining me
And if I take away what’s causing pain inside of me
leaving the shell of this romance
You are the one who knows
I won’t let you go
so easily

But in life there is a way to reap and sow the seeds
Of everything we’ll ever want or think we need
And if the scars that are left behind are all we feel
to break out of this once loving dance
and let each other down
As easily as possibly we can do
For I still care and love and cherish you

For I still care and love and cherish you
And together life’s too good for both me and you
The dance is not the same
though deep and steady is the flame
of what I feel for you,
So take me with you when you run
For our life together’s not yet done,
And let’s take each other on
and not let each other down,
go peacefully as possibly we can do
For I still care and love and cherish you

posted in Personal, Poems, Songs | No Comments

Feb

2000

Is there an honesty when alone?

by Stephen Messer

A world comes crashing down,
when, with nobody else around,
and faced with the torment
of a lack of honesty,
I’m regaled by the prospect
of what it means to be me.

And drowning out that torment,
fully engulfed by the torrent
of a world so filled with noise;
the information streaming
words and pictures to numb my being.

Words and pictures
to numb my being.

This is the escape I’ve found
for when my world comes crashing down.

But the torrent still remains.
Emotionally charged I feign
an apathetic disregard
for the things I’ve found so hard
in a life that lacks the honesty
of being who I want to be.

When that honesty I cannot share
with my own self when alone, I dare
to face, embrace, and take apart
the battered shell I’ve presented
to the world that is this longed-for art,
and it’s only myself I’ve resented.

But the shell that is this life I lead
cannot fulfill the longing need
that takes away the loneliness
I must drown away in information;
streaming words and pictures —
information —
words and pictures…

Entertainment.

Knowledge is power,
but the power is over me.
What will it take to break free
from this loneliness, dishonesty?
That feeling that I am not me?
The feeling I must relinquish power
to the world of words and entertainment
streaming into my brain.

A numbed and tired brain.

A spirit trampled down and left behind
in egregious adventures of the mind
and body, but not the soul,
not the one I really know
I can become.

And this is fun?

posted in Introspection, Metaphysical, Personal, Poems, Songs | No Comments

Feb

2000

Buried them all

by Stephen Messer

I went back to the start and
found I hadn’t really been that far.

No cares or worries should there be, but
that just isn’t me.
It’s all too serious.
It’s just too serious.
Erase the actions
Is there satisfaction
in the delerious
all too serious
face you’re presenting me
The race to where
you think you want to be

and in the end, we’re back at the start
have we made any progress yet this far?

And life just isn’t the same,
but that just isn’t me
It’s all too serious
It’s just too serious
Get a reaction
for some satisfaction
in this weariness
It’s all too serious
the things you do to me
the place that’s where
you think you want to be

and in the end, go back to the start
there hasn’t been anything worth it this far.

posted in Metaphysical, Poems, Songs, Time | No Comments

Dec

1999

Sunset

by Stephen Messer

The hills peel off
into an expanse of time
that I’ll pass through too.

Silhouetted, their worn and
jagged shapes strung out,
layer after layer,
before me.

I face the cowardice
that comes with solitude;
the blood oozing from knee;
reminding me
of the finite nature
of this perception.

Facing a yellowing sun,
I watch the dimming
of a star that gives us life
and serves as chronometer
of that life’s passing.

The descent from this peak,
This pinnacle,
lays ahead.
I face it with the
trepidation that comes
from knowing,
the courage that comes
from feeling,
and the winsome thought
of
what tomorrow brings.

posted in Introspection, Kisner Collection, Nature, Poems | No Comments

Dec

1999